Dating an uncool guy
If he doesn't bother about your reduced contact, you dodged a bullet. Good luck :)I agree with everything except for the ghosting...
I think ghosting has become all too common in dating these days, and it's really a horrible thing to experience.
I've been on the receiving end of this, and the giving end, but I amended my ways after having it happen to me. Yeah part of me thinks I should just back off for a while and see what happens, but I can't help but feel like that's "playing games" you know?
But you're right, I don't want to be the initiator forever It sounds fine but he doesn't seem to be meeting some sort of expectation you have for him ie he has been like this from the start and now you suddenly expect him to change who he is?
He's not a big texter so I don't want to feel like I'm bothering him by setting up dates or texting in between, but at the same time if I don't I feel like nothing will happen.
After our last date we were texting a few days later and I said something along the lines of "I'm down to keep this thing going if you are :)" and he replied "Of course! I feel like it's too early to be having "I need more communication/effort" talks without me coming off as needy/clingy.
Also this statement:"I'm down to keep this thing going if you are :)"..a little vague. Passive's head is truly in the clouds, he could've misunderstood that. If he's just a passive guy and is really into you but can't express his feelings very well, sleeping with him will make him comfortable enough in the relationship to do that. Love your comment :) I agree that it's a two way street. It sounds like the op is just trying to find something to bitch about. The only way the op can be taken seriously is if she is dating a dude with one or more of the following problems: Honestly, if any of that is true then the op is better off without this guy. She wants him calling and texting her, sharing his feelings, and all that crap.
I wouldn't have the "I need more communication" talk yet, at least not for the next few dates. On the other hand, if I don't want to be the initiator forever, then maybe I shouldn't set a precedent that I will be. When I read your story I felt like your situation is kind of like a combination of the previous guy I dated and the current one I'm seeing!!I would, however, wait for him to set up the next date. If some chick puts me on the spot about about not showing her more attention then I know it is time to hit the "eject" button.And, also, maybe dial back on the texting/communication that you initiate. You could ghost him, but if he's a seasoned dater, ghosting will simply indicate to him that you're no longer interested/met someone else and he'll never follow up. That way you can find out what his true motives are. The fact is, this op has a predetermined set of expectations that she wants to impose on this guy.Any guy would be happy to hang out with someone he knows is interested so that he can bask in adoration without making an effort.He's not making an effort to reciprocate or match your level of enthusiasm.